A Heavy Heart

As i sit here and write this blog . My heart is heavy with emotion . Something i am dealing with that i need guidance from above !
About nine months ago my daughter and her husband's life changed forever . Their world came crashing down around them on a Wednesday night .

I hadn't been really close to my daughter and i had heard rumor's about the drugs . Just really didn't want to believe it . You see they had been messing with drugs for a while and it caught up with them on that night .

They were sitting home enjoying an evening together .
They heard a noise outside . Jimmy (husband) picked up his gun and as he was going to the door . A loud knock on the door. Sheriff's dept . They ordered both of them on the floor . Just as my daughter hit the floor . Shots rang out and in return a swat deputy began shooting . When it was over . Two deputy's were wounded in the arm . My daughter was alright but Jimmy was down with numerous wounds .

He was taken to a hospital then transported to a trauma center . He had 27 bullet wounds . It was near death for many weeks . Daughter was finally taken to him not even knowing if he were alive or not .

She called me and asked me not to judge her and Jimmy . I didn't know what she was talking about till she told me . I being disabled . I couldn't go to her and be there for her . I was in pain of not being there .

He finally recovered enough to go home but had a long recovery ahead . The Sheriffs dept was in contact with them . No charges were filed at that time . Turn's out his insurance decided it wouldn't pay and they ended up with around 250 thousand dollars owed . Unemployment was out of question for him . My daughter lost her good paying job . Thankfully she got to draw unemployment .

Three weeks ago they learned that arrest warrants were drawn up . They had been in touch with a lawyer . He advised turning themselves in . Two weeks ago on Wednesday they did with lawyer present . First bond was set at 450 thousand dollars then reduced to 150 thousand . for Jimmy . Unable to get bond money they now have Jimmy in jail and will soon be transported to state prison . First court date is in July .

My daughter wasn't charged till this past Monday . They let her out on her signature . Jimmy is facing 20 years . Daughter may get probation . Hopefully ! Her world has come apart . Now there is bar's between him and her . Because they can't afford a decent lawyer which wants 35 thousand dollars to defend them . They are forced to accept a court appointed attorney . Meaning Jimmy will probably get 15 to 20 years .

I am in no way defending what they did . It looks like if you wound a cop ya get 15 to 20 years but if you shoot a citizen you may just get probation and kick in the ass . I ash is that fair ?

On this night i plan on writing a letter to Jimmy . I have no idea what to say . All i can offer is moral support . I have no means of helping him except being their for my daughter when she needs a shoulder to lean on .

You know i was thinking this evening with tears flowing . After this is over . I may never see my son in law again and when he gets out i will probably be dead . That is sad !

I do pray the Lord will give me guidance in knowing what to write .

People always say do the crime , do the time . It sure is easy to say that but when it hits home it isn't funny . I am having a hard time dealing with this but in time i will adjust .

If anyone decides to read this . Drugs destroy lives , family's , people around them . I see it on tv every day . Now i am seeing it firsthand !

A Prayer By Muni

My heart is broken and tormented..Many of the people I care about are going
through so much right now..My sweet friend Janet lost the love of her life and I
know there are no words to ease this pain..My own life needs some healing..Please lets pray for all those in some need of Peace and Comfort..I would like to take just a moment to say, Lord please bless us all not just in our time of need but always, I know when I'm happy, when I'm sad, when I need a friend, when the load feels just a little to heavy, my heavenly Father it's You, You who will be there and who will always lift me up and give me the strength to face another day..Thank you my Lord for all that You do and for all that You are and thank you for hearing my prayers and blessing all the people I love and more importantly all the people who turn to
you in the good and the bad times..In Jesus name I pray!!..Amen...Muni